Cloudcroft, NM






When The Fat Lady Sings”   

written by:

Joplin James Sell &
Arlan Ponder

Cast of Characters

Circus Board Members/Administration

Ondar D. Begtup
Ringmaster/ President of Board
played by

Dead-found Friday morning 
in Uptin’s room-smothered.

Mackie N. Munny
 Circus Security/Board Treasurer
played by
Charliss Randal

Herum Pipes
 Circus Organ Player/ Board Vice-President
played by
 Dave Venable

Annie Mable Lunes
Clown/Head of Circus Performers/Board Secretary
played by
Gloria Wood

Uptin Flames
 Fire-eater/ Head of 
Sideshow Acts/ Board member

played by

Dead-found Friday morning, 
drowned in his bathtub.

Sideshow Actors

  Don D. Hatch
Sword Swallower
played by

Dead-found Friday morning 
in his room, stabbed

Ineeda Shave
 Bearded Lady
played by
Arlan Ponder

Liftin Tons
Strong Man 
played by
Bruce Wafful

 I. Ken Bownce
Rubber Guy
played by
Joplin James Sell

Hessin Slither
Goth Snake Charmer
played by
Nicole Linn

Andie Loose
Wild Amazon Girl
played by
Carrie Bryant

Joy D. Hip
Siamese’s Twin One
played by

Stucco Widher
Siamese’s Twin Two
played by

Circus Performers

  Aerial Flips
 Trapeze Artist
played by
Joyce Trott

Guy Wires
Trapeze Artist
played by
Alan Hale

Ima Fonny-Won
Clown one
played by

Y. Donacha Laff
Clown two
played by
Jennifer Rupe

  C. M. Roar
Lion Tamer 
played by
Ken K Kern

Pacca Derm
Elephant Trainer
played by
Sandi Lawrence


Dr. Willie B. Hardigan
played by
 Gary Wood

Once upon a time...

Ladies and gentlemen, Children Of All Ages, step right up and experience The Greatest Circus Show On Earth!   It’s the annual convention for the Bracelet Sisters & Bailey’s Scottish Cream Circus.  Performers, freaks, and clowns have descended upon the sleepy village of Cloudcroft, New Mexico.  Where there’s a circus, one can of course expect to find thrills, cheers, and mayhem. 

But on this fateful weekend…there’s MURDER!

For 106 years the Bracelet Sisters & Bailey’s Scottish Cream Circus has been entertaining America by traveling across the country by rail during the summers to bring their marvelous show to millions.  Once a year after the close of each season, the performers and staff meet to plan for the following year’s schedule of events.  This year, The Lodge of Cloudcroft, New Mexico was chosen for this dastardly convention.  Nineteen staff members fly in on Wednesday evening from their winter grounds in Sterling , Illinois to El Paso , Texas .  Everyone drives from the airport to The Lodge in three shuttle vans; one for the Administration staff, one for the Circus Performers, and one for the Sideshow Actors. The group has booked the entire Third floor of The Lodge and everyone (except the Siamese’s Twins, of course!) has their own rooms.  

The convention begins Thursday afternoon at 3p.m. , where the staff first meets to discuss and evaluate the past season.  Everyone is present at the meetings, except the Ringmaster; Ondar D. Begtup, and the circus organ player, Herum Pipes. Both men are said to be in Ondar's room all afternoon preparing for the evening presentation - where it is believed that Ondar will announce new cast changes for the following season.

Rumor has it that the Circus Performers have been pressuring Ondar to get rid of all Sideshow Acts. They believe that the public comes to each show to see them and only them and not the "freaks of nature" (what they call the Sideshow actors). Tensions have been building over the last year between both groups and during the afternoon meetings tempers actually begin to flare and get out of hand.

Arial Flips and Guy Wires argue that the increase in revenue this past season is due to the "true" Circus Performers and not the freaks. This upsets most of the Sideshow Actors, and led by Stucco Widher and Ineeda Shave, they warn the group they will unionize to prevent them from being fired. The meeting gets so out of hand with shouting, name-calling, and belittling, that the staff of The Lodge threatens to expel the group from the hotel if they don't get control of themselves. The meeting is adjourned at 5:30 p.m. for a two-hour dinner break.

During the first hour of the break, (5:30 pm-6:30 pm), a secret meeting is held by all Sideshow actors, except Uptin Flames, in Ineeda's room to strategize and discuss forming the new UFOCSS (Union of the Federated Operating Circus Sideshow Stars), in case it would be announced that evening by Ondar that their acts were being let go from the Circus. The rest of the cast have their meals in the dining room where the Lodge is serving stuffed Chili Rellenos for the main course. Uptin Flames is seen by Pacca Derm eating with Annie Mable Lunes. They look as if they're having a serious discussion during their meal.

At 6:45 pm, on their way back to their rooms, Ima Fonny-Won and Y. Doncha Laff, could hear a commotion coming from Ondar's room. Besides Ondar's and Herums's voice, there is another voice but they are unable to recognize it. Herum is heard yelling, "These damn freaks are costing us too much money!" To which Ondar replies, "They have every right to be a part of this circus as the rest of us!" Ima and Y. Doncha could only hear the unrecognizable voice begin sobbing uncontrollably.

Ondar calls for a special closed board meeting in his room at 7:10 pm. Present are all board members, Ondar, Mackie, Annie Mable, Uptin, Herum. At 7:30pm, all cast members gather again in the meeting room downstairs. Some board members appear to be unhappy and quiet. Ringmaster Ondar gives praise to everyone for a season that was very profitable. During his speech, he states, "Even though I have felt much pressure to downsize our Sideshow actors, I will NOT, and let me repeat it, will NOT make ANY cast changes for next season!" There are many gasps and murmurs from the cast members, especially the Circus performers. Mackie N. Munny and Herum Pipes are both VERY visibly upset while Annie Mable Lunes and Uptin Flames remain emotionless.

The meeting continues with Ondar's shocking plans to expand the sideshow tent area the following year to include even more acts. Ondar states that in a 3-2 vote from the board members that evening, he believes the expansion will help to bridge the rift between the cast members. Furious, the Circus Performers get up and leave the meeting, yelling obscenities at Ondar and the Sideshow actors. With half the cast gone, the meeting has to be adjourned until 9:00 am the next morning.

Later that evening, between 8:00 pm-10:00 pm, cast members are all off doing their own things. (Drinking!) All the Sideshow Actors, except Don D. Hatch, are loudly celebrating in the Red Dog Saloon. Don has complained of not feeling well and gone to bed early.  There is a lot of talking and movement in the bar. During the two-hour period, all Sideshow actors leave the bar at one point to "use the restroom or make a phone call."  Uptin comes into the bar at 8:45 pm and pulls Ineeda and Stucco aside. The three men are seen whispering in a comer for about 15 minutes. Joy D. Hip is listening to music from her IPOD during this conversation, never hearing what her brother is saying with the two other men. Uptin then makes a toast and wishes his congratulations to all the Sideshow actors for sticking together. He heads upstairs at 9:05 pm. Pacca Derm, who's been drinking in the comer the whole time with C.M. Roar, becomes drunk beyond belief. She begins to taunt Andie Loose at 9:15 pm, calling her "a wild whore-freak" and the two women get into a huge cat fight. Mackie N. Monny and Liftin Tons have to pull Andie and Pacca off one another. Pacca yells at the top of her lungs, "I'm going to kill you one day!!" and storms outside. Andie bruised and bloody heads upstairs to her room at 9:25 pm.

Most of the other circus performers have chosen to stay upstairs in their rooms for the rest of the evening, but a few are seen sitting together in the Red Dog bar nursing their egos and scowling at the happy Sideshow Actors. Arial Flips and Guy Wires come in from 8:15 pm-8:40 pm. They do not speak to anyone only just have a beer and leave.  Y. Doncha and Ima come in around 9 pm and have a glass of wine. They witness the toast and the cat fight and are seen laughing during both. They leave at 9:20 pm. Ringmaster Ondar is seen with Annie Mable sitting by the fireplace by Ineeda Shave on his/her way back from the bathroom. He/she notes that around 9:40pm, Ondar receives a cell phone call and leaves in a hurry frantic upstairs. Everyone else stays in the bar until it closes at 10:00 pm then heads to their rooms.

The next morning at 9:00 am, everyone gathers again in the meeting room but Ondar and Uptin are nowhere to be seen. Annie Mable excuses herself to see if management can fetch them. After 15 or 20 minutes she bursts back into the room crying, 

"They're dead!  They're both DEAD!!"

Everyone begins consoling each other when Joy D. Hip realizes that Don D. Hatch is also missing at this time and sends management upstairs to his room.

All Sideshow Actors are now beside themselves because they are in mourning for the loss of Ondar, Uptin and Don. All Circus performers seem unmoved by the three deaths. They show no emotion what-so-ever and only keep repeating, when asked about the tragedy, "As Ondar said last night, the show must go on!" The remaining Circus Board members also seem indifferent about the deaths. Herum Pipes and Mackie N. Munnyjust shrug their shoulders, "We warned him that these freaks would cost us." Annie Mable Lunes is a wreck. A mystery man appears with a camera and notepad and begins taking pictures of the Sideshow Actors. Occasionally he laughs at the mourning actors as he takes their pictures. When he is done taking pictures he begins interviewing the board members.

Since the Cloudcroft police are so short staffed, they decide to let Mackie N. Munny lead the investigation into these deaths. She states that everyone is now a suspect and will not be able to leave until this tragedy is solved ... including the mystery man.  Everyone is told that they must report back Friday night for informal interviews and again on Saturday night for formal questioning and to hold elections for a new board President.

Why have these three men died? Who hated these men enough to kill them? What is to become of the show? Start putting your clues together, Sherlock, as you try to solve,




Circus Board Members

Ondar D. Begtup: Ringmaster/President of Board - A feeble old man, whose family has owned the circus for four generations, and it's rumored there might be off-springs but nothing is confirmed.

Herum Pipes: Circus Organ Player/ Board Vice-President - The brother of Ondar, co-owner of the circus, he is a true-blue performer who is not afraid to say that he did NOT vote for the Sideshow expansion.

Annie Mable Lunes: Clown/Head of Circus Performers/Board Secretary - She is known to be loud, bossy, and a true clown, but has a true soft spot in her heart for Sideshow Actors. She has three children in the Circus and it is rumored no one knows whom the father is because she's slept with many men.

Mackie N. Munny: Circus Security/Board Treasurer - She is the bumbling not too bright, sister of Herum and Ondar and sheriff for the Circus. She cares more about making money than protecting the rights of the Sideshow actor's. She voted against the expansion because it seemed like the right thing to do after talking it over with Herum.

Uptin Flames: Fire-eater/ Head of Sideshow Acts/ Board member - A man in his 60s who has been a part of the circus since he was 12. He's watched performers come and go and knew all about the relationships between cast members.

Sideshow Actors

Don D. Hatch: Sword Swallower - He was an amazing performer who could make people gasp with his sword swallowing abilities. He is proud to be a Sideshow actor and believed, "If we stand together, they'll have to accept us!"

Ineeda Shave: Bearded Lady - He/she is a very vocal Sideshow activist. He/she believes that Sideshow actors should be proud of whom they are and stand up against the injustice and intolerance of the Circus Performers. Thinks he-she knows all the dirt of the Circus Board members and performers.

Liftin Tons: Strong Man - Another Sideshow activist who feels his sister, Ima Funny-Won, is ashamed of him since he is a "freak". He is cocky and possesses no people skills.

I. Ken Bownce: Rubber Guy - He is a very strange, eccentric and gentle (autistic) Sideshow star who is limited in speech except to occasionally say, "Ut oh Baby" He can move his body in many different poses.

Hessin Slither: Goth Snake Charmer - Hardcore to the max, she is the sister of Ineeda Shave and shares in her sibling's passion for justice.

Andie Loose: Wild Amazon Girl - The youngest child of Annie Mable. Doesn't believe in showers, and rarely uses utensils when eating. Annie Mable laughs at everything she does and treats her more like a pet than a daughter because of her wild side. She tells people that one day she'd like to be a normal circus performerEmaybe working as a dog trainer.

Joy D. Hip: Siamese's Twin One - She is the quiet, introverted twin who would rather listen to her music than talk politics. She is meek and shy and was married but got a divorce after only two weeks.

Stucco Widher: Siamese's Twin Two - Another loud and vocal Sideshow star, he is a natural leader, who is helping to organize the union. Not as rough around the edges as Ineeda or Liftin, he sees himself as more of a peacemaker.

Circus Performers

Arial Flips: Trapeze Artist - She is a true show stopping performer who loves to "oooo" and "ahhh" the crowds. Everything about her is big: her hair, her attitude, the colors of clothes she wears, the way she talks. She will often brag about how great she is and ask people if they would like her autograph.

Guy Wires: Trapeze Artist - The brother of Arial who isn't into the "show" as much has her. He would rather spend time talking about religion or reading the Bible than about his next stunts.

Ima Fonny-Won: Clown one - She is a very high society clown, one who would rather be glamorous than silly.  Is the sister of Liftin Tons but is ashamed to let anyone know. SShe dreams of touring with Cirque Du Soleil.

Y. Doncha Laff: Clown two - She's a true clown, always falling down or honking her horn to get a laugh out of people. She can't stand the Sideshow actors because "clowns should be laughed at, not people.   Her brother is C.M. Roar.

C. M. Roar: Lion Tamer - Controller of the big cats, he also thinks he is the star of the show. "No, circus is complete without a Lion Tamer!" He is often heard boasting. He is also a wannabe ladies' man.  His sister is Y. Doncha Laff.

Pacca Derm: Elephant Trainer - Party animal who can't hold her liquor, she is the middle child of Annie Mable.  She will often try and pick on her older brother, I. Ken Bownce, for being so strange or her younger sister for being so wild.

Willie B. Hardigan: Reporter/Zoologist - Believes the sideshow stars are actually freaks of nature and missing links. He is investigating whether there is a link between these folks and porphyria. A ruthless old man who takes a lot of pictures, but no one seems to know where he came from nor why he is here.
















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